Fool in the Rain
by BunnyGum
Summary: Destiel AU- Castiel Novak has something very important that he has to take to Kansas City. After his car breaks down and a handsome stranger in an Impala picks him up help his dilemna, everything changes and his objective begins to become less important than what's been distracting him- Dean Winchester.
1. Ramble On

'Fuck. Fuck.' Castiel pushed harder and let out a quiet moan. Drops of sweat began to drip down the side of his face. It was making him hot and sweaty. His legs were shaking.

'Come on-' He whispered.

He gave up. The car wasn't going to move. Cas wasn't exactly the most _muscular _person, so it was hard for him to push his Ford SUV. But what was he supposed to do? There wasn't a car in sight, he didn't have his phone and there was no other way to get his car to the nearest gas station. He knew he would have to leave it there, but what he had inside was too precious.

Cas went to the car window and looked inside at the brief case on the back seat. He sighed, opened the door, and took it out. He had to take it with him. It was extremely important to him. Of course not the brief case itself, but the thing it was protecting. The case, black shiny and big enough to put a laptop inside, wasn't hard for Cas to carry around. He was just concerned that what it contained would be affected somehow. He had driven so far. And now, he was stuck. He had to be in Kansas, but here he was in South Dakota.

Cas trudged up the road. The land was flat and crops were on both sides of the road. There were crops everywhere. In fact, it looked quite pretty. Cas wished he had a camera with him so he could take photos. Rocks stuck out of the ground. He stepped over a hole in the road and continued. He could see something in the distance. He squinted and guarded his eyes with his hand from the glare. He could see a tall sign. A gas station. Cas would be able to use the phone to call for help. And maybe he would be able to buy something to eat. He was starving. A burger or a sandwich, even if it was wrapped up and filled with preservatives.

Cas whistled a song to lift his spirits, but it didn't change anything. He had walked for 20 minutes now. He hoped to escape the dark clouds that were moving closer towards him, but they were coming to quickly. He heard thunder.

'Oh shit.' Cas uttered.

Very light rain began to fall. The road started to shine from the moisture.

'_Oh_.' It surprised Cas. He thought it would be worse. But of course, he was wrong. The rain became heavier and heavier and soon it was _pouring_. Cas put his briefcase in the inside of his trench coat. Big thick drops of rain fell down to the ground- most of them were hitting Cas.

'Fuck!' He walked quickly. His soft brown hair became drenched and his shoes became muddy. It felt like hell.

* * *

The gas station didn't seem to come any closer towards him. How long was it going to take until he walked through those doors? Cas fantasized about fireplaces warming his hands, a heater, a cup of a drink that was warm. That was what he wanted. What the hell was he doing there? Sure, he going to be paid for it, but he didn't think it would become that difficult. Cas began to walk even slower. He wanted to fall to the ground and sob and cry. His clothes were wet. His briefcase was wet. Cas muttered curses. He just wanted shelter.

'_Hello?'_

Cas turned to his right.

'Hi there.'

Cas was speechless. With its engine running was a Chevy Impala with a young man at the wheel.

'I- uh.. hello?' Cas felt confused. Who the hell was this guy?

'Is that your Ford back there?'

Cas nodded.

'Do you need help?'

Cas nodded again.

'So... do you wanna get in?'

He didn't want to simply get inside a stranger's car.

'I'm going to the gas station back up that way.' The man pointing towards the way Cas had walked from. 'I'm calling for help it's okay.'

Cas squinted.

'No, see, I work at a car yard. There's a truck there that I can drive up here to get the car for you. I'll drive you back there. You look soaking.'

Cas looked down at his dark brown trench coat, which was light brown before, then back up to the stranger.

'So you're a mechanic?'

The man nodded.

'Yep.'

'Well uh- okay.' Cas opened the front seat door, looked up at the stranger again, then stepped into the car. After closing the door, he looked around at the interior. It was a nice car. Well kept, despite its age.

'I'm Dean by the way.' Cas turned to him.

'Oh.' He put his hand out. 'I'm Castiel.'

'Castiel? Hmmm. Nice name.'

Dean turned the car around and drove in the direction towards the car yard. Cas smiled to himself. Usually people would say things about his name. _Not nice _things. And he hated some of the nicknames he was given. Balthazar in high school who would call him 'Cassie.' Zack calling him 'Cat' when he was 10 years old. His sister calling him 'Ellie.' Dean was the first person in a very long time to compliment on his name upon meeting him.

'So where you from?' Dean asked.

'Uh- Illinois.'

'_Really_?'

'Yeah.'

'I'm from Kansas.'

'Kansas huh?'

'Yeah. Lawrence.'

'Did you grow up there?'

'Yep. I'm living in Sioux Falls though right now. Just helping out with Bobby. Oh- he's the owner of the car yard.'

'Right.'

Cas held the brief case to his chest.

'I'm going back there actually.'

'Lawrence?'

'Yeah. I have some stuff to do in Kansas City first but afterwards I'm going straight on home.'

Cas smiled.

'That sounds nice. I haven't been home in a while.'

Dean nodded.

'So what are you doing in the middle of nowhere?'

'I'm driving through the state. I have some things to do. In Kansas actually.'

'Well that's, that's great. Where are you heading?'

Cas didn't exactly want to share where he was going, but he trusted Dean.

'Kansas City.'

'Oh really? I'm not going in the plane though. I'm taking the car.' He patted the steering wheel.

'You're driving there?'

'Ha,' Dean swallowed, 'you should come with me.' Dean smiled, but was frowning at the same time as if he was unsure of whether to show Cas a grin or not.

'Thanks but no thanks.' Cas then smiled.

Dean smiled at Cas, without the frown, then looked at the road again. Cas felt so, _awkward. _Awkward because Dean was so kind to pick him up. But Cas sat with his back straight, not leaning on the seat. He felt like an ant in a giant room. Dean noticed how he was sitting, and wanted to push him back into the chair so the stranger knew it was okay for him to relax in the car. But like Cas, he was somewhat cautious and unsure of how to act with him.

A gas station was coming up. Cas remembered passing it, but of course, that was when he wasn't in distress.

'I just have to buy a few things. Do you want anything?'

'No, I'm fine thank you.'

Dean parked the car and went into the station. He found an issue of Busty Asian Beauties and started going to the checkout. Then he remembered how hungry he was.

Cas looked at the CDs Dean had.

'Hmm.'

He took out a CD and put it into the player, but didn't see that the volume was turned up to full. And with the windows rolled down, it would sound even louder from outside the car.

Dean began to hear ACDC playing loudly. He looked out the window. Castiel was searching the car, and he assumed he was trying to turn it off. Dean groaned. The music stopped, and Dean let out a chuckle. He bought what he needed and took it all back to the car. Cas was bright red. His arms were by his side and he looked down to his feet. It was like seeing a dog after it did something bad. The eyes shifting slowly then moving back. The tail between the legs. The flat ears. Dean had known a few dogs in his lifetime, so he knew exactly what they looked like when they were guilty.

'Hiya Castiel. Had a little, _incident _with the CD player did you?'

Cas made a fake smile.

'Yeah it was uh..'

Dean smirked and threw his things into the backseat of the car.

'Don't worry about it. You gave me and the store owner a scare that's all.'

Cas smirked back at Dean.

* * *

The car ride began to feel less slow when Dean put on Led Zeppelin II. Cas didn't mind being in the car with him. Sometimes he'd look over to him curiously. Dean would look to Cas, then to the road. Cas couldn't deny that Dean was attractive. Those lips, those eyes, the hair. Everything about Dean screamed handsome. At first glance, you'd think he was a model. But of course that idea would then be covered up with the leather jacket, the plaid and the dirt covered boots.

Dean wanted to sing and tap the wheel to the song that was playing. He would have if the man wasn't there. Cas made him curious. He kept looking at Dean, as if wanting something. It made him happy that he was helping the guy, but he didn't think about the silence that would fill the car when they were on the road. He decided it was time to talk again.

'So Castiel.'

Cas's eyes widened and he sat up.

'Uh, yes?'

'What's with the brief case?'

'Oh.' What was Cas supposed to say?

'It just has some things inside.'

Dean nodded. He was so cute. He liked the way Cas talked, how Dean intimidate him and how fond he was of his trench coat. (He would always be touching it, almost _stroking _it)

'Cutie.' Oh shit. Did he just say that out loud?

'Sorry?' Shit. Cas had heard Dean.

'Uh-' He paused for half a second but it felt like 10. 'Nothing.'

Cas squinted. Had Dean just said what he think he said? Probably not. Cas was feeling tired from driving the night before. Whilst driving on the dark road and living off coffee he had been tempted to stop at a motel, but he wanted to arrive in Kansas City early. Just so there'd be less pressure.

'Dean?'

Dean was glad Cas had forgotten about him murmuring what he said.

'Yes?'

'Why are you driving to Kansas City, instead of flying?'

'I should be asking you the same question.'

Cas tilted his head.

'You first.' Dean said. The look in his eye pinned Cas to the chair. Everything slowed down when Dean gave him the look. He struggled to begin to talk.

'Ahem. What I have in the brief case is very important to me. Very.'

'Okey dokey.'

'And you?'

'Flying? I _hate _it. It scares the hell outta' me.'

Cas smiled. 'Seriously?'

'Yeah. Seriously.'

He laughed. Dean didn't look the type.

'Don't laugh!' Dean smiled as he talked and it warmed Cas's heart. He laughed. Dean liked the way Cas laughed. It was like, 'Heheh.' It was slow and husky. He liked it. He liked Cas's laugh.

* * *

Dean was singing to the song playing. Cas didn't mind at all. In fact, he tried to join in. He mumbled most of the lyrics, which made Dean laugh.

'Hey Cas could you pass me the pie it's in the back.'

Cas tilted his head.

'What did you call me?'

'Uh- sorry. I-'

'No. It's okay. Everyone calls me Cas.'

The sides of Dean's mouth curved slightly.

'Do you want me to open it for you?'

'That would be appreciated.' Dean replied.

Cas smirked and began unwrapping the thin plastic covering from the pie then handed it to Dean. He began eating the sides of it.

'Did you want some?' Dean asked with a mouth full of food.

'No thanks.' Deep down he was saying 'I'm starving.'

'Come on.'

'It's your pie.'

'I'm willing to share with you.'

Cas opened his mouth.

'Eat some you must be hungry.'

He gave the hand-sized pie to him. Cas decided to eat some. He gave it back to Dean and he would eat some, then give it back to Cas. Soon they had finished it. Cas had crumbs on the sides of his mouth.

'You have-' Dean touched his own mouth with his fingers. 'Crumbs.'

Cas wiped his mouth with his hand, but there were still lips above his upper lip.

'Here-' Dean wiped Cas's mouth. Cas blushed.

'You're red.' After saying it, Dean felt bad. But Cas looked so cute.


	2. Thank You

The Impala approached Bobby Singer's house and parked outside. The front door opened and he came out, wearing his usual attire. Blue denim jeans with holes on the knees, a plaid t-shirt, a jacket and his trucker's hat. Dean opened the car door and stepped out.

'Dean? I thought you were on your way to Kansas.'

Dean stepped out of the car smiling and pointed to Cas.

'Oh,' Bobby then said, 'Who's this?'

Cas stepped out of the car.

'Uh-'

'A new boyfriend Dean?'

Dean's smile disappeared and he blushed. Cas raised his eyebrows.

'No- this is uh,' He was extremely embarrassed. 'this is Cas. Castiel. His car's on the side of the road up from the station a few miles from here. You know the place?'

'Yeah I know it. Come on in.'

Dean and Bobby began to walk to the door. Cas remained standing by the car's side with his big black brief case against his chest.

'Come on Cas.'

Cas opened his mouth to talk, but then closed it and followed Dean.

* * *

'Do you want anything to drink, Cas?'

Cas was looking at a framed photo on the mantlepiece of two young boys standing with Mr. Singer.

'Cas?'

'Oh.' Cas turned. 'I'm fine thank you.'

'You sure?'

'I am sure. Thank you.'

Dean entered the living room and collapsed into the couch.

'Siddown' it's okay.'

'Are you sure?'

'Cas. Sit.'

Castiel sat next to Dean on the couch, but didn't rest his back on the cushion. Dean groaned and pushed his shoulders back.

'Oh uh-'

Dean shook his head.

'Just relax. Right now, you're a _guest_.'

'But I'm just waiting for my-'

'Bobby's taking the truck to the car. Trust me. It will be okay.'

Cas swallowed. Dean's eyes were killing him.

'Okay.'

'Am I interrupting something?' They both looked over to see Bobby standing there with an unopened beer in hand.

'No!' Dean seemed very defensive. 'I mean-' He looked over to Cas. His cheeks were going bright red again.

'Ahem- are you leaving now? Bobby?'

'Yeah. I'll see you in an hour.' He looked at Cas, who had his legs crossed.

'See ya' Cas.'

Bobby left the living room. Once again, it was awkward for Cas and Dean.

'There's some pie in the fridge.'

'I'm fine thank you.'

Dean nodded.

'So Dean-'

Dean looked at Cas.

'Yes?'

'Is that you in the photograph over there?'

'On the mantlepiece?'

'Yes.'

'Yeah. It's me. With my brother Sammy.'

'You have a brother?'

'Two actually. Sam and Adam. Adam is my half brother.'

'Do they live here?'

'No. Sam's been moving around the country the past few years. He's a lawyer. Always doing cases for people. You know. Adam, well-' Dean frowned. 'Adam's in prison. He has been for a while.'

'_Oh._ I'm sorry.'

'No, it's okay. It's a long story... so how about that pie?'

* * *

Cas gave in to Dean and decided he would have some of the pie that he had made.

'It's my Mum's recipe.'

'Did you bake it?'

Dean nodded. Cas smiled.

'I didn't picture you a baker.'

'You'd be surprised by how many people tell me that.'

Cas stuck his fork into the warm slice and took a piece. He blew the steam away, put the fork into his mouth, then slid it out.

'Mmm.'

Dean grinned.

'Good?'

'Yeah.' He was still eating as he said this.

Dean slid a slice for himself onto the plate and sat across from Cas at the table.

'So do _you _have family?'

'Yeah. One sister, Anna, and a brother, Michael.'

Dean smiled with his mouth open and nodded. Cas noticed he glanced at his lips whilst he talked.

'And Bobby is your-'

'Uncle. Well, close family friend.'

Dean prepared himself for the 'where are your parents' question, but he didn't hear it. Cas smiled and nodded.

'So how long have you been working here?'

'A few years. A _while_. Sam's a lawyer now though.'

Cas grinned.

'Wait.. I said that.' Dean chuckled. 'I'm just, happy for him.'

'My sister is a doctor at a Psychiatric Centre... and my brother, well-'

Dean frowned.

'What?'

'He's undergoing uh... drug rehabilitation right now.'

'Sorry.' Dean said.

'It's okay. _I'm _sorry. For him. It makes me so frustrated. That assbutt!'

Dean frowned again, then grinned.

'Ass_butt_?'

'It's just something I say.'

Dean slapped Cas's arm.

'Ass_butt_!?'

Cas smiled and his cheeks went red.

'You're funny.'

They noticed each other's eyes and realised that they really were enjoying themselves. Dean rarely had people come inside the house. But Cas was the exception.

'So is this the first time you've let a customer inside for pie?'

Dean chuckled and took another bite from the pie on his plate.

'No no,' he smiled, 'I've had _so _many women in here.' He said facetiously.

'Oh yeah? So a pretty woman comes to get her car fixed you let her inside and give her some of your mother's pie?'

'Well technically, it's my pie. I made it.'

'Sure.'

They shared a grin and continued to eat.

'So uh- what's for you in Kansas City?'

'I'm meeting someone. An old friend.'

Cas leaned forward and Dean swallowed.

'Really? Who?'

'Uh, _Benny_.'

'Benny? Who's Benny?'

'A friend of mine. We used to work together.'

Cas's eyes stayed fixed on Dean.

'Working together where?'

'What is this? 60 Minutes?'

Cas laughed, which made Dean smile even more.

'What's _your _silver lining?'

'Huh?'

'Why are you smiling like that?'

'Like what?'

'It looks like your face is about to fall off.'

'Ha ha, I'm just happy that's all. I don't usually get company around here. Apart from Bobby of course.'

'And your female acquaintances.'

Dean laughed and pushed Cas's hand away.

'Oh- and hey,' Dean began. 'What's with the trench coat?'

'What do you mean?' Cas replied, smiling.

'You're always touching it. And you haven't taken it off.'

'Do you have something against my trench coat?'

'No! I love it! Seriously. But why?'

'I'm not sure. I've had it for a long time. It was second-hand. His name is still on the tag.'

'Well I like it.'

Cas tilted his head.

'A lot of people say they don't like the colour.'

'Well,' Dean said, hitting his lap, 'it brings out your eyes.'

Cas smiled.

* * *

Dean stepped out of the shower and went to his set of drawers to pick out new clothes.

'Dean?' Cas had opened the door.

Dean, who was only wearing underwear, saw him and stepped back slightly.

'Oh- Cas..'

Cas closed the door.

'Sorry Dean.. I- I just want to ask you a question.'

'Shoot.'

'Could I watch the T.V?'

Dean smiled.

'Of course you can Cas.' That was another thing Dean liked about Cas. He was always so unsure of things, and had to ask cute questions.

'Okay. Thankyou.'

* * *

When Dean went into the living room, Cas was sitting there on the couch watching T.V. Dean sat next to him.

'What are you watching?'

'A soap opera T.V show.'

Dean knew what show it was.

'Sam used to watch this.'

Cas's eyes remained fixed to the screen.

'He did?'

'I know what happens at the end of this episode.'

Cas smiled.

'Tell me.'

Dean leaned over to his ear and opened his mouth. Cas turned his head to face Dean's. Their lips were two inches apart. Dean's eyes moved down to look at Cas's mouth.

'Look at those eyes.' Cas said, moving his face closer to Dean's.

'I should be saying the same thing about yours.'

Cas smiled but said nothing. Dean liked him. Dean was attracted to Cas. Cas of course could say the same thing. Dean was charismatic, humourous and extremely handsome. But Cas didn't want to find himself leaving this man who was so,_ perfect. _They moved away from each other. Dean smirked to himself, Cas did his best to stop himself from smiling.

As Cas showered, Dean opened up his toolbox and took out each thing that he needed. He heard the shower turn off and it tempted him to go the bathroom to see him wet and with a towel wrapped around his waist. After polishing each tool Cas walked into the work area wearing Dean's ACDC t-shirt and the trench coat and pants he had worn.

'Sorry-' He looked down at the shirt. 'I hope you don't mind, my other shirt was-' 'It's fine.' Dean nodded.

Cas smiled and lifted his head as Bobby's truck came up the drive way. He turned the car so Cas's car was in the work area and parked.

'Hi Dean.' Bobby said as he opened the door.

'How'd it go?'

Bobby nodded and looked from Cas to Dean then smiled.

'It went good.'

'Did you have difficulty finding the car?' Cas asked.

'No- I mean, how can it be hard to find something like this on the side of the road?'

Cas smiled.

'Right.'

* * *

Bobby and Dean worked on Cas's car whilst he looked through Bobby's collection of books. They were all on fishing, hunting, and some were portfolios of car magazines. The 10 book collection of fishing guides mesmorised him and he ran his finger along each one.

'Cas?'

Cas turned to see Dean standing there. His fingers were black and his pants were a dark brown at the knees.

'It's fixed.'

Cas smiled.

'Really?'

'You're free to go.'

'Thank you. Thank you so much.'

'No problem.'

'How much will it cost?' Cas reached into his trench coat pocket and pulled out his wallet.

'No- please. It's fine. No cost.'

'But-'

'Cas. You don't need to pay me.'

Cas frowned and put his wallet back into his pocket.

'I guess I better leave then.'

* * *

Cas opened his car door and stepped inside. He put his brief case on the front seat. The two others watched. Bobby turned to Dean and gave him an angry stare. Dean mimed, 'What?' Bobby motioned his head towards Cas and mimed, 'Go on!' Dean exhaled quickly and frowned.

'Bobby.' He said quietly.

'Come on ya' idjit.'

Dean looked over to Cas who was rolling up his window like it was a matter of life or death. He walked over to the window and tapped on it with his knuckle. Cas unrolled the window again.

'Yes Dean?'

Dean looked over to Bobby, who raised his eyebrows and tilted his head.

'Uh- listen... It will probably cost you a lot for.. gasoline. So maybe it would be better for you, _economically _if you came with, me.'

Cas stared at Dean for a few seconds before answering.

'Well. It _does _make sense. We _are _going to the same place and I guess I can take the plane to the airport here to drive my car home.'

'Exactly.' Dean said casually.

'Yes. I'll come with you.' Cas nodded and smiled.

'Really?'

'Yes.'

Dean grinned and opened the door for Cas. He picked up his brief case, stepped out and walked over to the Impala, glistening in the sun because of Dean washing it that morning.

'See how pretty she is today?' Dean touched her door and opened it for Cas.

'Be my guest.'

Cas sat on the leather seat, as he had that morning, and put his brief case to the floor. They waved goodbye to Bobby, who had his arms crossed and looked very satisfied.

'Thank you Dean.'

'What for?' Dean began to drive out of the car yard.

'For welcoming me like this. Accepting who I am and being kind to me. You know, fixing my car, giving me pie, driving me to Kansas City.'

'It's no problem.'

'I feel like I should repay you.'

'No. You were sort of repaying _me_. I've had a terrible day Cas. Well, I was having a terrible day. I've gotta be honest. I don't want to go down to Kansas City Cas. I wish I could tell you why, but I just can't. It's too hard for me to talk about it. That's why I was having such a bad day. And I just needed time to get my head together. I was saying, please God I want to go home. I wanted to wind down for a few hours and sort out my head. And I saw this guy, this miserable guy walking up the road, _wet._ I felt so sorry for you. And I _wanted _to help you. And then you do these cute things and you cheer me up. Thank you Cas.'

'Thank you Dean. That's very kind of you.'

Dean looked at Cas, and Cas did the same to Dean.

'You're a good guy Dean. You're not like some of the guys I know.'

Dean's eyes went back to the road.

'The other guys?'

'They're all assbutts... uh... _idiots._'

Dean laughed. The drive to Kansas City was going to take five hours, but Cas would make it feel like two.


	3. Good Times, Bad Times

'Dean?'

Dean snapped out of his trance.

'Yes Cas?'

'Do you listen to this band a lot?'

'ACDC? Yeah, I listen to them a lot.'

'Are they your favourite band?'

'Hmm... no.'

'What's your favourite band?'

'Uh... Led Zeppelin.'

Cas nodded.

'What's with all the questions?' Dean asked.

'Oh, well, I hope you don't mind Dean. I just want to know more about you, that's all.'

Dean smiled.

'Well why are you asking the questions can't I ask a few?'

'Of course you can.'

'Okay then.'

Pine trees began to quickly pass the windows.

'What is your favourite food?'

'Uh... burgers.'

'Bacon cheeseburgers?'

'They're okay.'

'Okay next question... are you single?'

Cas grinned.

'Why do you want to know?'

'I'm just wondering.' Dean said with a cheeky tone.

'Yes. I'm single.'

Dean nodded and raised his eyebrows.

'Why, do you find that surprising?'

'A little. Okay- what are you afraid of?'

'Women. Next question.'

'What!?'

'Nothing!'

'No tell me!'

'I get _very _nervous around women.'

'But that's not a _fear._'

'Okay okay... I'm very afraid of being in, dark _forests._ With big trees and noises and... it just creeps me out.'

Dean frowned and nodded.

'Do you know why?'

Cas sighed.

'My Dad used to be a sort of, _ranger_. Looking after the forest. You know. The place really creeped me out. It was only a short time ago that I found myself lost in the same area. I had to sleep there for the night. It wasn't good. It wasn't good Dean.'

'Your Dad was a ranger?'

'Yes, he was for a while.'

'So what does he do now?'

'To be honest I'm not sure. He left the family when I was eight years old. Took right off.'

'I'm sorry.'

'It's okay. Don't worry about it. What about your Dad?'

'He moved Sam and I around a lot. We never really settled down anywhere. He was always losing his job. But he'd tell Sam and me that he quit. We knew the truth though. We always knew what was going on.'

'And... your mother?'

'She died a long time ago. That was why we moved away from Lawrence in the first place.'

'But you're going back there again?'

'Well, it's my home. It'll always be my home. I go there a few times a year you know? Stand outside the house, see who lives there.'

Cas looked sad.

'Are you okay?' Dean asked.

'Are _you_?'

Dean frowned.

'It was tough but- it's a lot easier now Cas.'

'Good. I'm glad to hear that.'

Dean smiled.

* * *

Castiel and Dean walked into the diner and found a booth to sit in.

'So what would you like?'

Cas looked over to the menus up on the wall.

'I'll have a diet coke with pancakes.'

'I don't know if they're still doing breakfast.'

Dean raised his hand for a waiter and one came over.

'What would you like today?'

'Hi uh- are you by any chance still cooking from the breakfast menu?'

'Well, sure we are.'

'Okay then.' Dean looked over to Cas. 'Two pancakes, two diet cokes.'

'Sure...' the waiter wrote down their order then left.

'No pie?' Cas asked.

'No pie. I feel like pancakes.'

'So have you ever been here before?'

'I think I came here early last year on my way up to Lawrence.'

'Dean?'

'Yeah?'

'What exactly are you doing in Kansas City?'

'Told you. Meeting with Benny.'

'Doing what?'

Dean exhaled through his teeth.

'_Things_.'

'Is he your _boyfriend_?'

'What?'

'Is he your boyfriend?'

'I know what you said Cas I- what makes you think he's my boyfriend?'

'You're being very vague about exactly what you're doing. Perhaps you feel embarrassed about it?'

'No I, Cas. Benny and I are friends.'

The waiter brought two cups of coffee over and they began to drink in silence. Dean then brought his cup quickly down to the saucer and put his elbows up on the table.

'And how did you know I was-'

'Gay?'

'Yes.' Dean leaned forward. 'Gay.'

Cas continued to drink his coffee.

'Oh,' Dean then began, 'and where's your handbag?'

Cas's eyes opened in shock and his put his cup down.

'Where are the car keys?'

'Why what's wrong?'

'Have you _locked _the car?'

'Yes, I've locked the car.'

'Are you sure?'

Dean huffed, slid out of the booth and left the diner. He went outside to the parking lot, put the key in the driver's door and turned it as Cas looked through the window at him. Dean opened the door, shut it, then put the key in and turned it again. He opened the car door handle, and sure enough, it was locked. He raised his eyebrows and bowed to Cas.

'Okay! Fine!' He could see Cas mime.

When he went back inside, there was a plate of pancakes where he was sitting.

'Sweet lord.' He said as he slid into the booth.

They began to eat their 'dinner' and enjoy the atmosphere of the diner. When finished, they went to the motel next door to get a room to sleep in for the night.

* * *

Cas stood outside in the cold with his brief case whilst Dean paid for the room.

'Cas!' Dean came out holding up a key with the number '15' on it. 'What are you doing out here? It's so cold!'

'I thought I would just- stand here.'

'Well come on! We have a room!'

They entered the room and collapsed onto the bed. 'It feels so nice to be on the bed.' Cas thought. 'Comfy bed.' Then he realised. 'Bed.'

'Dean?' He asked, sitting up. 'There's only one bed.'

Dean sat up and looked at the bed.

'Oh. Right. This was the last room.'

'It was?'

'Yeah. Guy had to give me the room with the queen bed.'

Cas patted the soft covering then grabbed the remote control on the bed side table and turned on the T.V.

'I guess we'll just have to make do.'

Dean stretched and yawned.

'Come on Cas I have to get my four hours.'

'Four hours? Come on Dean you can't be in _that _much of hurry.'

'Well, I am. I'm sorry Cas. I really have to get to Kansas City.'

'I know I know. Benny- _friend _stuff.' Cas sighed and turned the T.V off. Dean sat up and pulled his t-shirt off. Cas's eyes widened. Next he unzipped his jeans and tugged them off, and then he put his legs underneath the covers of the bed and shuffled under. Cas took his trench coat off and awkwardly stood there. He looked over at Dean, who was facing the other way on his side.

'Cas what are you doing?' He said with a muffled voice.

'Uh- I'm undressing myself.' Cas took his pants off. Dean huffed and stepped out of bed.

'Come on Cas!' He walked over to him on the other side of the bed and helped him out. Dean untied Cas's tie then unbuttoned his shirt.

'Dean you really don't have to-'

'No. It's fine. Really.'

Dean held Cas's arm and tugged off the sleeve then did the same to the other arm. So there Cas and Dean were, standing in front of each other, wearing only underwear.

'Bed.' Cas mumbled.

Dean groaned then went back into the bed. Cas did the same and turned the lamp off at the bedside table.

'Do you want to talk Dean?'

'There's nothing to talk about.'

There was five seconds of silence.

'Okay.' Cas replied. He turned to face the other way and closed his eyes. Dean began to breathe in with a steady rhythm and Cas couldn't help listening to him. Dean turned around to face Cas then slowly moved forward and snuggled into Cas's back. Dean entwined his legs with Cas's and fell asleep. Cas smiled, enjoyed the moment, then he too fell asleep.

* * *

Dean woke up to the morning sun and the warmth of Cas's head on his shoulder. He looked down at his peaceful face then smiled. Without waking him, he lightly touched Cas's hair. After a little while, Cas began to stir and he revealed his shining blue eyes. He looked up at Dean and smiled.

'Hi Dean.'

'Mornin' Cas.'

They both dressed themselves then went to the diner to eat breakfast. This time, they didn't have pancakes, but bacon and eggs.

'So how did you sleep?' Dean asked, smiling.

'I slept... good.'

'Someone was up against me I think.'

'I could say the same thing.'

They took the room key back to the motel, then went to the Impala and drove away. Dean played loud Blue Oyster Cult and like their first car ride together, Cas tried to sing along.

'No no no.' Dean said. 'It's but I _live _to see those rays slip away.'

Cas didn't care about what Dean said. He was singing it his own way. Dean was dying of laughter.

'You... you're distracting me! I'm tryna' _drive _here!'

Cas sang loudly.

'Oh no!' Dean shouted jokingly. 'Make it stop!'

For the next hour, they sang, laughed and ate pop rocks. Until of course, Cas was tired and fell asleep. Dean looked over to him and smiled at how cute he looked.

'Little Cas..' he murmured.

* * *

Castiel woke up to see a large lake surrounded by pine trees. He opened the car door and saw Dean, sitting on a post looking out at the water.

'Are you okay Dean?'

Dean smiled and turned to Cas.

'Sleepy head.'

Cas grinned and went over to sit on the post next to him.

'Sorry I was so close to you last night.'

'It's okay. It was a cold night.'

'I really shouldn't be getting so... _attached _to you.' Dean said, smiling.

'Why's that?'

'Because soon we're going to part and possibly never see each other again.'

Cas looked out to the sky's reflection on the lake and shrugged.

'That's okay.'

Dean sighed.

'I like you Cas.'

'I like you too Dean.'

'So will we keep in touch?'

'I don't know.'

'Well why _can't _we?'

'Because Dean.'

'Because why?' Dean was beginning to sound upset.

'I'm sorry Dean it's just- I don't want to get involved.'

'With _me? _Because of my _life?' _

'No Dean, it's not like that.'

'Then what is it? I really like you Cas. And I know that you like me too.'

'I have too much stuff in my life.'

'And that makes you so special? That makes you fragile? I've had shit in my life too Cas but that's not stopping me.'

'Dean it's complicated.'

'I'm just trying to put myself out there Cas. I'm just trying to have someone again. I _need _someone Cas. The past week- it's been so difficult. With my Dad...'

'So what, you just love me until you're fine then leave me?'

'That's not what I meant!'

'You need someone just like I need to get back to the car.'

Cas stepped down and went back to the Impala. He opened the door, slid in, and closed it.

* * *

For the rest of the drive, they barely talked to each other. Every now and then Dean would glance at Cas to see what he was doing, but he would only stare out of the window, holding the brief case close to him. Dean frowned and finally spoke up.

'And why don't you put that fucking brief case down?'

Cas frowned and turned his head to Dean.

'No.' He turned his head back to the window.

Dean felt very guilty. In fact, he just felt like an asshole. Cas didn't want to have a relationship, and he should have respected that. Dean had told Cas almost _everything_, but Cas still had secrets that Dean assumed he would never hear. He wanted to hug him and apologise, but it wasn't that simple. Why did he have to take it so far? Maybe if he hadn't shown attraction to Cas he wouldn't have been in the mess to begin with.

Cas was upset. He really thought Dean would listen to him. But now, he had lost the one good thing he had. Dean hated him, and Cas would never be given the time to apologise. Whenever he looked into Dean's eyes he saw pain and anger. How he wanted to just see through those green eyes and really find out what was mentally tormenting Dean. But it was too late. He would go into Kansas City, find the airport and deliver the package. And that would be the end. Dean would go to Lawrence and Cas would fly to Sioux Falls to drive his car home.


	4. Whole Lotta Love

Cas didn't seem too interested in his surroundings as Dean drove them into Kansas City. Statues looked over large areas of grass and shadows of skyscrapers covered other buildings. But like Cas, Dean wasn't interested in where he was. He just wanted to find his way to the airport.

'I can walk to where I need to go from here.' Cas said, pointing to the footpath. Dean pulled over and Cas opened the door.

'Thank you, Dean.'

Dean said nothing. Cas nodded his head, grabbed his brief case and stepped out of the car.

'Goodbye.'

Dean drove off and turned the music volume up. Another friend lost. And perhaps even, a relationship, he thought. But now Cas was gone. And he would never see him again.

Castiel walked up the footpath and found a liquor store. He stood outside and looked through the windows. It was a rough day. And it was time for a drink. When he went inside, he realised how warm it was. But there was nothing to bother him, so he decided to stay. He stood around in each aisle for five minutes, then one of the workers came up to him.

'Do you need any help sir?'

Cas looked from the worker to the shelf, chose a bottle of Jack Daniel's, and walked to the checkout. It was expensive, but he didn't care. He wanted something good to drink.

* * *

Cas stood in front of the mirror of a public bathroom and drank from the bottle. He was getting his pants wet sitting on the edge of the sink but he didn't seem to care. He liked it there. The dirty mirror, the broken hand drier and the pay-for-condom machine didn't bother him. It was just him and his drink.

After he lay on the ground in depression and anger Cas left the dirty bathroom and took a taxi to the airport. He paid the driver, left the car, and started walking to the sliding door entrance into the terminal. Then he realised. His brief case. His 'handbag.' He had left it in the car. When he turned around to go back, the taxi was gone.

'No.. no...' He uttered. Cas walked to the road to try to see where it had gone, but he couldn't see it. He was too late.

'Why? Why?' Cas began to breathe quickly. His forehead was beginning to sweat. His hands were shaking. He was soon breathing so loudly people walking by were staring at him. He couldn't feel his head, and suddenly, he couldn't feel his legs either. Cas fell back.

The sun was shining brightly, so it was difficult to see who had caught Castiel. When the man blocked the sun, he finally saw who it was.

'Dean.' He said, frowning.

'Cas are you okay?'

'I uh..'

Dean lifted Cas up and helped him walk towards the terminal entrance.

'I'm fine.'

'No you're not Cas. You should have seen your face. Pale as a ghost. Seriously, you need to sit down.'

Cas shook his head.

'No Dean I- my brief case it's-'

'Forget your brief case Cas. You need to sit down.'

Dean slowly brought Cas down into the leather couch in the middle of the terminal walkway.

'My brief case Dean, you don't understand. I left it in the cab.'

'You what?'

'I need to find the car that brought me here. I need that brief case.'

Dean nodded.

'Okay, here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to take you over here,' Dean pointed to a small café, 'and I will get you a glass of water. Then I will call the cab service and see what they can do. Okay?'

Cas nodded.

'Okay.'

Once Cas was sitting down with a glass of water to drink, Dean patted him on the back and left.

* * *

The building smelt of cigarettes and laundry. Outside was a parking lot with around fifty black and yellow cars, each awaiting a driver. Dean strolled up to the front desk, where a tall pale man was sitting down looking at a computer screen.

'Hi,' he began, 'A friend of mine left a brief case in one of the cabs.. a big black one.'

'What did the brief case look like?'

'What?'

'What did the brief case look like?'

'I, I just said- it was large, about this big, and black.'

'Oh, I see.'

The man put his hand under the desk and pulled out a briefcase.

'This one?'

On the brief case was the name 'Castiel' engraved into the gold latch.

'Yep. That's it.'

A short man walked over to see what they were talking about.

'You here for the brief case?'

'Uh, yeah. For my friend.'

'Yeah what he'd look like?' The man was obviously the taxi driver and wanted to see if Dean really knew what he looked like.

'Short dark brown hair, sort of fluffy at the front, blue eyes, a big trench coat, crooked tie, stubble, amazing jaw.'

Dean showed his I.D then the worker sitting at the computer passed Dean a form and a pen and he signed it.

'Thank you.'

Dean took the brief case and left.

As he drove to the airport, Dean was tempted to open up the case and see what was inside. Cas had been so protective of it. What was he hiding in there? He so badly wanted to open it up, but Cas trusted him. And opening that case would have made him even more upset with Dean.

Cas's head throbbed from the liquor and the coffee. Sleep would have refreshed him. Even just for five minutes. His spirits lifted as soon as he saw Dean walking into the café. He looked flustered, but his grin stood out to Cas. In his hand, was the brief case that was missing.

'Dean.' Cas smiled as Dean sat down. The case was slid onto the marble table across to Cas.

'Thank you Dean.' Cas opened it up facing himself and looked inside then nodded. 'Thank you.'

Dean wanted to peek inside, but he decided not to.

'I don't know what would have happened if you weren't here.'

'Cas just- answer me. Why are you here?'

'Why am I here? I'm meeting my family here. They're landing soon.'

'But why Kansas City?'

Cas swallowed and looked at the brief case. He shrugged. Dean knew he wasn't going to get an answer.

'Why don't you tell me Cas? You don't _trust_ me?'

'Of course I trust you Dean. It's just- there's a barrier around it Dean. If my, ahem, _brother _found out that someone else knew about it, he would be upset. I'm not sure why he wants it to be a secret. Anyway, they'll be here soon. I hope so.'

Dean smiled.

'I wish I had a phone so I could text you.'

Dean took out his wallet and gave Cas money.

'Go buy something cheap.'

'What?'

'Buy a cheap cellphone.'

'Why?'

'Because you need a phone.'

Cas huffed.

'This is your money.'

'Listen, Cas. I want to call you after this. So go buy a phone.'

Cas opened his mouth to talk.

'Go.'

When Cas returned he had a cheap cellphone in his hand.

'Do you want my number?' Dean asked.

'Later on.'

They ordered something to eat and talked for the rest of the evening. Cas completely forgot about why he was there. He forgot about Jimmy, he forgot about what was in the brief case. The only thing on his mind was Dean. It was like being in the car again. Just talking about their lives, about their opinions, about their likes and dislikes.

* * *

The motel room door opened and Cas and Dean entered kissing each other with their tongues deep in each other's mouths. Dean slammed the door and pushed Cas against the wall. Cas pushed his leg up Dean's thigh and thrust his hips into Dean's stomach. Dean had his hands grabbing Cas's butt and his lips moved down Cas's neck.

'Dean-' Cas uttered with his rough voice.

Dean lifted Cas up and lay him down on the bed. Like a cat he moved up Cas's body and leaned down then kissed him. Cas put his arms around Dean's neck and slid his legs up from around Dean's ankles to around his hips. Dean kissed Cas's upper lip and continued to do so slowly.

'Fuck me Dean.'

Dean unzipped his pants and turned Cas over. He slid a condom over his hard cock and let Cas take his pants and underwear off. Dean slowly went into Cas.

'Dean.. Dean..' Cas moaned. 'Fuck me...'

Dean smiled as he moved in and out of Cas.

Cas grabbed the side of the bed and arched his back. Dean came and white liquid went down the sides of Cas's left. They lay there for a few seconds before Dean pulled out, lay next to Cas, and kissed him with tongue. Cas wrapped his arms around Dean and moved him closer towards himself. Their hips touched and their cocks were hard against each other. Dean leaned over to Cas's ear and whispered seductively, 'Such a beast Cas.' A devilish grin appeared on Cas's face and he ran his tongue up Dean's neck.

* * *

When Dean woke up in the morning, Cas lay there with his eyes open, staring at Dean.

'Good morning.' Cas said.

'Were you watching me?'

Cas sighed.

'Maybe.'

They kissed each other passionately. Dean started to pull away but Cas lingered. He quickly kissed Cas's cheek then checked his phone. He had a text.

'Benny?' Cas asked.

'Yeah.'

'I have to go to the airport again. Do you want to come with me?'

'Yes.' Cas ran his hand through Dean's hair. 'You have lovely hair.'

Dean smiled. Cas tapped Dean's nose.

'Boop.'

'You're so cute.' Dean kissed him. Cas moaned.

'Keep doing that.' Cas said.

'Kissing you?'

'Just keep kissing me.'

Dean kissed him again, this time touching Cas's tongue with his.

'Mmm.' Dean heard Cas say.

'I like kissing you.' Dean touched Cas's jaw and ran his finger up to his chin, then lifted his head. 'I'm going to kiss you again.' Dean did so, this time moving his body over Cas's.

'I-' Dean stopped Cas from talking and kissed Cas's lower lip then pulled it away.

'Fuck, Dean.' Cas smiled and brought Dean's lips to his once again.

* * *

Cas and Dean left the motel and went back to the airport. After finding a car park, they walked into the terminal and sat at a table in the food court.

'What do you want for breakfast?' Dean asked as he gazed at Cas. Cas smiled, leaned forward, kissed Dean on the tip of his nose and leaned back.

'Pancakes.'

'You really like pancakes huh?'

Cas nodded.

Dean smirked, stretched his arms back and left the table. Cas looked down at his brief case and it reminded him of why he was there. He checked his phone and saw a text message from Jimmy. There was only a short amount of time until he had to give away what was in the case.

'You okay Cas?'

Cas looked up and Dean was standing there with two plates of pancakes.

'I'm fine.'

They ate without talking, but not in silence. The noise around them of plates clinking, people talking, and footsteps on the floor was loud enough to cause them to not talk. At least that's what Dean thought. Cas realised that he would soon have to face the man he had been searching for. And now here he was, waiting for Jimmy to arrive so he could hand him the contents of the brief case.

'Dean.' Cas began as he put his knife and fork down.

Dean leaned in to hear him better.

'Yes Cas?'

'After we leave this place,'

Dean stopped smiling. He knew what Cas was going to ask.

'_Are _we going to keep seeing each other?'

Dean opened his mouth, but closed it afterwards.

'I _want _to keep seeing you Cas... I want to ask you something. Later though. Right now, I'm waiting. For Benny.'

Cas frowned.

'Okay.' He said, continuing to eat. Dean moved his left foot onto Cas's foot, and managed to get a giggle out of him.

'I'm not going to leave you Cas. We're staying together.' Dean pouted his lips and put his face up to Cas's. 'Okay?'

Cas touched Dean's hair and felt it between his fingertips.

'I'm staying with you.'


	5. Babe I'm Gonna Leave You

Cas and Dean sat in the food court sharing a pizza. They had now been there for three hours. It didn't bother them though, they had talked the entire time. Dean knew he was slowly falling in love with Cas, and Cas felt exactly the same way.

'Cas,' Dean said, wiping his mouth with the napkin. 'I want you to come to Lawrence with me.'

Cas looked up to Dean and smiled.

'Are you being serious?'

'_Yes _Cas! Of course I am!' Dean touched Cas's leg with his foot. 'I want you there with me. Just for a few days.'

Cas's smile spread even further across his face.

'Of course I will come Dean.' He held Dean's hand and leaned in then kissed him. When he pulled away, Dean lingered, and he found that so sweet.

'And we'll go to a nice hotel.'

Cas leaned in again.

'Really?'

Dean smiled.

'Yes.'

'What about my car?'

'I'll call Bobby.'

'Okay.' Cas was blushing. 'What will we do in Lawrence?'

Dean frowned.

'Hmmm.' He rested his hand on his cheek. 'I want you to see the house I used to live in.'

'Sure. Dean uh-' He stopped.

'What?'

'Why did your family move out of the house?'

'Well... my Dad he, after she died in the fire we just left. Just like that.'

'She as in, your mother?'

'Yeah. Anyway-' Dean sat up and grabbed Cas's hands again. 'After that, we can go find the hotel we want, eat something, go for a walk.'

'I can't wait.'

'I've never really, taken someone to a hotel though. Or on any kind of date like that.. so sorry if it doesn't go to plan.'

'I'm sure it will be fine.'

'I hope so, I just want to see you. I want to be around your-' Dean waved his hands over Cas.

'My what?'

'Your personality.'

'My personality?'

'Yes.'

Cas couldn't stop smiling. His face was hurting.

* * *

Another two hours passed until Dean realised that something was wrong. He walked to the bathroom and stood outside the door.

Jimmy was calling Cas. Finally.

'Jimmy I-' It was too loud in the food court to hear what he was saying on the other end.

'Jimmy I'm sorry I can't... I'm here in the food court!'

Dean stormed back to Cas and sat down. He huffed.

'Is something wrong?' Cas asked, tilting his head.

'It's.. it's Benny he- he's here somewhere. I don't see him though.' Dean looked around at each table.

'One sec-'

Dean went over to a table two away from them and tapped the shoulder of the young man sitting there. Cas curiously watched. The man sitting there shook his head and Dean looked upset when he turned around.

'Does Dean know what Benny looks like?' Cas was thinking.

When Dean sat down he was edgy and sounded nervous.

'I don't know where Benny is... I don't know where he is...' Cas put his hand on Dean's shoulder.

'Dean it will be fine. He said he's here didn't he?'

'I hate airports..' Dean muttered.

There was sympathy in Cas's eyes. He knew that feeling when you don't know what to do, when you're confused, frustrated. Dean was having that feeling. He wanted to help him, but he didn't know who this Benny guy was.

'It'll be okay Dean. Don't worry.' Was Benny Dean's boyfriend? It made sense, Dean was getting so anxious about not seeing him. If that were true, then what was he doing with Cas? He felt confused about why Dean wanted Benny so much.

'Is he,' Cas found the courage to ask Dean, 'is he your boyfriend?'

'Benny?'

Cas nodded.

'No Cas.. it's more complicated than that.'

'Then why do you not _tell_ me?'

'Because. I just can't. It's to do with my Dad.'

Cas sighed and looked down at his feet.

'Okay.'

Dean continued to look out for the man he expected. He could see Cas wanted to help him, but it wasn't that simple. How fucking long was he going to take to get there? Then he realised. All the ideas, the feelings, the suspicions, the confusion, the anger, what he had heard what he said, everything he knew about Cas came together and he knew why he was sitting there waiting.

'Sonofabitch..'

Cas looked up at him.

'What is it?'

'What's in your brief case Cas?'

Cas frowned.

'Give me the brief case.'

'I can't let you do this Dean.'

'Just give me the fucking brief case!'

Cas slid the case over to him. Dean looked up at him, then to the latches and flicked them up. He opened it up, and there it was. His Dad's journal. Sitting next to it was a large cigarette tin. His Dad's ashes were inside it. He looked up at Cas.

'Cas...'

'You're-' Cas found it difficult to understand the situation. 'You're Jimmy.'

Dean smirked. 'So you're not here for family?' He said, closing the brief case.

'I-' Cas swallowed. 'You're Jimmy?'

Dean put his hand out.

'Hi, Jimmy Page.'

Cas squinted, and shook Dean's hand.

'So is Dean your real name?'

'Yes. And my brother, Robert, is who sent you.'

'He's Sam.'

'Yes. It all makes sense now. What happened to Gabriel?'

'Gabriel is sick with the flu. I had to do this for him.'

'So I wasn't supposed to look for a green eyed man with long light brown hair? I was looking for a sexy, tanned, blue eyed man?'

Dean looked down at the brief case and huffed.

'I'm sorry Dean.'

Cas noticed Dean's smiled had disappeared.

'None of this,' Dean smacked his hand on the table, 'this _waiting _and _wasted _time would have happened if you had just told me what you were taking across the country.'

'Dean. I couldn't just _tell _you. Your brother told me not to.'

'And I didn't know you were _driving _here! Why didn't you call me to say Jimmy I'm driving, instead of making me wait for you?'

'Dean. Your brother told me you preferred me to drive.'

'But Sam told me you were probably flying!'

'I'm sorry Dean. But how can you expect me to have told you everything about why I was going to Kansas City? Why didn't _you _tell about what you were coming here for huh?'

'Do you have any idea who my Dad is?'

Cas huffed.

'So you wish none of this happened? You prefer that I never walked up that road in the rain? That we never had this _connection_? Dean, I really like you. And I _know _that you feel it too. So why do you not want it now?'

'It would have been more convenient.' Dean muttered.

'More convenient? More convenient!? Dean! You have your fucking brief case! And I'm sorry okay- I'm sorry about what is inside it. But you seriously cannot be angry about losing time and having to get into this extra shit that you think is terrible! Well Dean, I _enjoyed _talking with you. And you may have worried today that you would never see your Dad's ashes and journal in your _hands_, but now you have it. And I had a fucking anxiety attack at the _thought _of not getting a father's ashes to his son, and I had this brief case close to me almost every hour. Take it Dean. Take it and leave. Go to Lawrence. I'm going home.'

Castiel pushed his chair out and left the food court. Tears began to touch Dean's cheeks and form at the bottom of his jaw. Cas was gone for good. He was too embarrassed to go running after him. And he knew if he caught up with him, Cas wouldn't want him. Like he said, he was going home. And Dean dramatically running up to him, twisting him around and kissing him wasn't going to change anything.

Cas bought a one way ticket to the Sioux Falls airport. He would go to Bobby's yard, take his car and drive back to Illinois. He had somehow led himself into something that he had no understanding of. Why had Dean wanted Cas to take the ashes to him? And who was Dean's dad? And Cas kept asking himself, why hadn't Dean chased after him? Didn't he _like _Cas?

'Excuse me.' Cas realised that he had been standing there at the desk staring into the distance.

'I need to get through.'

'Oh, sorry.' Cas moved away from the ticket desk and found his way to the gate. There were several chairs outside, so he sat down in one and waited.

* * *

Dean hit the road after buying supplies. Busty Asian Beauties, pack of gum, Baby Ruth, water bottle. The usual. Of course, it was difficult for him to drive away. Every time he saw a man with a trench coat on the short brown haircut of Cas's, his eyes stayed fixed on him until he realised it wasn't Cas. The guilt he felt inside him was overwhelming. But he couldn't go back now. He had to meet Sam in Lawrence, and finish the work he had to do. It was why he had left Bobby's car yard in the first place.

'Sam it's me Dean.' Dean began to drive away from the airport as he talked on the phone. 'Call me when you get this, I'll be there in an hour tops.'

Cas had one last look at the terminal before he went through the gate. Deep down, he was hoping that Dean would be standing there waving goodbye, but that was only a fantasy. The reality was that Dean didn't want anything to be complicated. He had an obligation, to get to Lawrence. And Cas was getting in the way of that. Castiel gave the worker his ticket, walked through the gate, turned a corner and came to the plane's entrance. He was allocated to his seat, then collapsed. Sleep. He just wanted sleep.

* * *

Dean liked the small things he saw as he drove to Lawrence. The jagged edges on the thirty year old tar road, the trees that had been blown down by wind but never taken away, the cloud that looked like a pair of angel wings. It felt strange not having Castiel there, but he knew the feeling would pass. If Cas was there, he would have commented on the things that Dean had taken a liking to.

'Look at that tree.'

'That lake looks beautiful.'

'Look at that cloud.'

But alas, Cas was _not _there to say these things. It was just Dean. Bob Seger's uplifting songs did not make Dean any happier, and John Bonham's drumming beat did not cause him to tap his finger on the steering wheel. The pie he had bought at a gas station was dry, even though it was the same flavour and brand of the pie he had shared with Cas. Then, the guilty feelings again. Why had he just left Cas in the terminal like that? What if Cas was crying as Dean drove to Lawrence? He pondered about Cas until he saw something ahead on the road. Cas. It was Cas, walking up the road wearing his trench coat. Dean stopped as soon as he realised what he just seen, then stepped out of the car and looked back. There was no one. Dean had imagined it. He sighed, went back into the car and continued up the road. The driving was making him tired.

* * *

'Would you like any refreshments sir?'

Cas looked up at the flight attendant and smiled.

'No thank you.'

The smile left his face as soon as the man left his seat row. He was trying his best to forget about Dean, but how could he? Cas couldn't remember the last time he was happy like he was with Dean. He hated himself for letting him go. He wanted to go back in time and tell himself to go to Dean. He wanted to land the plane in Lawrence. But there was of course the big thing that was stopping him, embarrassment. He imagined running to Dean, then a young woman going to Dean's side, and Dean saying she was his girlfriend. The whole scene played in his head.

'Dean! Dean!' Cas runs to Dean, who sits on a park bench. A woman with long dark hair and tanned skin goes to Dean and sits next to him. Cas is upset. Dean puts his arm around the woman and they kiss.

'Dean.'

'Cas? What are you doing here?'

'I came for you...'

'But Cas, I have a girlfriend. This is Lisa.'

'Dean, I thought you liked me.'

'Liked you? Cas, I have a girlfriend.' He chuckles and kisses Lisa again. Cas falls to his knees.

'Noooo!'


	6. Over the Hills and Far Away

Dean parked the car outside his old home. He smiled and admired it. The only part of the house that had changed was the second story, where of course, the fire was. There was a large 'For Sale' sign out the front. The last owners had obviously moved out since Dean last visited.

'Hi.' He whispered. Dean wanted to believe that she was still there, in Sam's bedroom.

* * *

'Hi can I get a diet coke?' There was half an hour of the plane trip remaining. And Cas wanted something to drink before he left the plane.

'Sure.'

He grew tired. The sleep he wanted, he did not get. The diet coke and two coffees would keep him awake enough to get closer to home. Unless, of course, he fell asleep at wheel and was in a fatal car accident. The idea of home would be the only thing to get him through.

* * *

'Hey Bobby it's me.'

'Dean? How are you? Are you in Lawrence?'

'Yeah. Sam will be here in a little while. Cas will be there tonight, he's driving home.'

'Oh. So he didn't want to go to Lawrence with you?'

'No. He did. Things just got complicated alright?'

'Alright. Alright. I'll tell him ya' said hi.'

'Bye Bobby.'

'See ya' Dean.'

Dean ended the call. Finally, he saw a set of headlights moving up the road through the darkness. Sam's car. The car parked on the side of the street and Sam stepped out.

'Dean.'

Dean went to him and gave him a hug whilst patting his back.

'How are you Dean?' Sam asked, pulling away.

'Great.'

'So, you met Gabriel easily?'

'_Actually, _I had his _understudy_.'

'Huh?'

'Don't worry about it. I have Dad's cigarette tin. I have his journal. Let's do this.'

* * *

'John, please, don't do this. We can talk about it.'

Dean could hear his mother raising her voice. He thought he would fall asleep again, but what they were talking about made him curious. He went to his bedroom door and peered through the crack. He could see them in Sam's bedroom.

'No Mary! I'm so tired of everything!'

'Please! John!'

Dean closed the door slightly. He could see a flash of a red flame.

'Goodbye Mary!'

Dean opened the door as soon as he realised there was a fire.

'Dad?'

His father had already closed the door. Sam was in his arms. Smoke was seeping through the cracks.

'Take your brother.'

He went to Dean and gave him his Sam.

'Dad? What are you doing?'

'Go out there Dean.'

He did as his father told him. Before he went down the stairs, he could see his father return to Sam's bedroom. Whilst he opened the door, he heard screaming. Dean went to the front lawn and watched as flames destroyed his brother's room. Their father came running to them and sat down with them.

'Where's Mum?' Dean asked, grabbing his father's arm.

'It's too late! It's too late Dean.'

'Where's Mum?'

His father held him close with Sam.

'It's too late.'

* * *

Sam and Dean stood on the house's roof, just above Sam's bedroom. Dean took out his lighter and lit their father's journal. Sam held it up and turned it so the flame burnt it. When it almost touched his fingertips, he brought it down to the roof's surface. It burnt there until there was only the binding left and left a large black mark. Finally, they opened the cigarette tin together with strength and left the ashes blow away. They didn't care whether they had just fallen to the ground or ended up in a tree. The ashes were separate and the boys' father was now truly gone.

* * *

'Oh, hi Cas.' Bobby opened the door further and let Cas in. 'Dean told me you were coming here.'

'Listen, thanks for everything. I really appreciate it. How can I pay you back?'

'What? No just accept it. Dean rarely makes friends. Thank _you._'

'Can't I at least send you something in the mail?'

'Boy, it's fine. Consider yourself lucky. I ain't one for charity repairs. Now come on, do you want your damn car or not?'

Cas grinned and Bobby led him through the house and to the garage.

'Here's your shirt by the way.'

Bobby threw Cas his white shirt he had worn that was replaced by Dean's ACDC shirt. He took his trench coat off, pulled off the t shirt and slid his arms through the sleeves of the recently washed business shirt. He buttoned it up, put his tie back around his neck, and covered himself up with his coat.

'Here's your keys.' Bobby grabbed Cas's hand and put his car keys into it. Then he patted him on the shoulder.

'Cas I, I hope you don't mind me asking but-'

'What?'

'What the hell happened between you two? Dean told me you were going to Lawrence with him.'

Cas sighed and sat down on the hard cement ground. He began to explain everything that had happened. Their arguments, leaving the terminal, discovering they were looking for each other. It was all a big misunderstanding but neither of them wanted to tell each other what they really wanted.

'Just answer the question Cas. Do you see a relationship with him?'

'_Yes_.'

'Then go to him. Don't leave him if you like him.'

'What if he doesn't like me back?'

'It's better to do somethin' than nothin.'

Cas nodded and exhaled loudly.

'Okay.' His head lifted up. 'I'll go to him.'

'That's the spirit! I'm driving you to the airport, and you're getting on a plane to Kansas City.'

Cas smiled.

'Come on ya' idjit!'

Bobby went to his truck and sat in the driver's seat.

'Well?'

Cas grinned, hopped on his feet and went to the truck. Maybe Dean _would _want a relationship. He could only hope.

After he bought his ticket, Cas went to the plane and found his seat. Once again, he was on the plane. But it was different this time. _This _time, he was going to Kansas to _see _Dean, rather than leave him.

* * *

'Thanks for coming up Sam.'

'No, it's okay Dean. I _had _to. He's our Dad.'

'Was. He _was _our Dad.'

'I know Dean. I know.'

'And he stopped being our Dad way before he died.'

Sam sat down on the pavement and turned around to look at the for sale sign.

'Would you ever buy this place? If you of course, had the money.'

'I dunno.' Dean sat down next to Sam. 'Too many memories.'

'You still remember it don't you?'

'What, Mum dying? Of course I do. I'll never forget that night.'

'He's gone now Dean. You don't have to worry anymore.'

Sam put his arm around Dean.

'I just wish things were different.'

'I know Dean.'

* * *

Someone poked Castiel's arm and he woke up.

'Sorry to disturb you Sir. The plane has landed.'

'Oh.' Cas looked around himself. 'Thank you.'

He left the plane then went into the terminal. He glanced at the table where he and Dean had eaten. It was like he had never left. There was the same noise of people talking, footsteps on the floor, and cutlery clinking on plates. He hired a car, found directions to Lawrence and drove. It was quite dark, but his car headlights were lighting the road. A Porsche went by quickly and that was the only vehicle he saw. When Cas finally arrived in Lawrence, he drove by every motel desperately and tried to find the Chevy Impala, but he couldn't see it anywhere. He drove through the streets, past houses, through parking lots trying to find Dean but he was nowhere. So, it was time to call Dean.

'Sorry I can't come to the phone right now. Please leave a message after the tone. Thanks.'

Cas groaned and threw his phone into the backseat.

'...okay. I'll see you soon Bobby.'

Bobby slammed the phone to the wall and groaned. He dialled a number and waited.

'Bobby? Why are you calling?' Cas hoped it was Dean, but when he saw the number that Bobby had given him he became sad again.

'It's Dean. He's driving here. Tonight.'

'Tonight? But I thought he said he was staying in Lawrence.'

'He changed his mind.'

Cas punched the steering wheel and the car horn sounded.

'I'll drive there, okay?'

'In a _rented _car?'

'Yes in a rented car. I'm not sure when I'll take it back, but it will go back to Kansas City one way or another.'

'Are you sure you want to do this Cas?'

'I need to see him Bobby. I need to.'

Bobby smiled.

'Okay Cas.'

'I really have to leave now then, I'll see you there Bobby.'

'See ya.' Bobby ended the call and went back to the couch. He felt privileged to be there in his home, and not in the seat of a car.

* * *

Dean drove past where he first met Cas. He sighed. Ideas filled his head of Cas loving him, forgiving him and taking Dean in his arms.

'Sorry Cas.' He said quietly.

The drive of over five hours seemed like a day for Dean. When he finally arrived home, it was 3:00 in the morning. He entered the house and paid no attention to Bobby as he lay on the couch.

'Hi Dean. How was it?'

'It was good.'

'Are you okay?'

'I'm fine.'

Bobby poured a shot of whiskey for Dean and put it on his desk.

'Come on boy drink up.'

'I'm_ fine_.'

'No you're not Dean.'

'I am.'

'Dean.'

Dean turned and looked up at Bobby. He groaned, took the glass and swallowed the liquid. He winced and slammed the glass back down onto the desk. Bobby stayed at the window the entire time, looking out for Cas.

'What are you looking for Bobby?'

'Nothing.'

'Then why are you standing there?'

For an hour, Bobby sat at his desk glancing at the window every now and then. Finally, he decided to call Cas.

'Sorry. I'm not available at the moment. Please leave a message so I can get back to you.'

'Balls!'

Dean jumped.

'What?'

Bobby sighed.

'It's Cas.'

Dean lay down again and shook his head.

'What about him?'

'I think he's in trouble.'

'Dean lifted his head and looked at Bobby.

'How?'

'He's not answering his calls. He was supposed to be here an hour ago.'

'You- you _invited _him here?'

'I had to Dean!'

'What gives you the right?'

'He likes you Dean! And you're too bone-headed to show anything to him back!'

Dean frowned and crossed his arms.

'You don't even know what happened!'

'Oh, I know _everything _that happened. And that boy took the plane back to the big KC, _drove _to Lawrence, and was willing to drive back here just to see you!'

Dean's jaw slightly dropped.

'And now- now he's god knows where and he ain't answering his phone!'

Dean jumped onto the floor.

'Was he taking the same route that I take?'

'Probably. I suggest you take the truck if you're bothered to go after him.'

Dean ran to the kitchen, grabbed Bobby's keys and his shotgun, and sprinted outside.

* * *

Castiel had walked for ten minutes now. He had left his headlights on in case someone was driving past, but he doubted that anyone would be on the road. He finally came to a tall, dense forest. It gave him the creeps. He continued up the road until he saw a large truck coming towards him. He put his hand out and waved, but it wasn't slowing down. It came closer and closer, until Cas had no choice but to step back into the forest. Little did he know, there was a slope going down that was covered with leaves and broken branches. Cas slipped and went rolling down. It must have only been about three metres, but with everything that he was poked with it felt like a longer distance. When he stood up, his legs were covered in moss and dirt. His hands had cuts on them and leaves were in his hair. And his ankle hurt.

'I must have twisted it.' He thought. Cas continued to walk through the forest in the direction of where the road was going. He assumed he was going south, but he couldn't see a thing. For all he knew he could have been going north. There was the sound of twigs snapping. He quickly turned around.

'Hello?'

There was no answer. He turned and slowly walked over the collection of tree branches. He heard leaves rustling in the tree above him. He saw something moving. Cas's ankle pain stopped him from taking another step. He sat down against the tree and bent his legs up to himself so he could rest his chin on his knees. It was going to be a long night.


	7. All My Love

'Cas?' Dean began to run from his car.

'Cas where the hell are you!?' He sprinted up the road towards the forest surrounding it. He had no idea where he would look first; he just needed to find his angel. Then, he saw it. A small Suzuki on the side of the road. It had to be Cas's. Dean began to run even faster. He jumped over the slope to the floor of the forest and extended his arms to find his way through the trees.

'Cas?' He sounded desperate. He was anxious. 'Cas...'

Castiel lay against the tree with his leg extended to ease the pain. Suddenly, he heard rustling, then a familiar voice calling his name.

'Dean?'

Dean heard Cas say his name.

'I'm here Cas! I'm here!'

Dean followed the sound and searched the area for a person. Sitting against a pine tree was the stranger. The 'fool in the rain.' He smiled, and rather than running, he walked over to the tree and crouched to the ground. Cas began to cry as soon as Dean came to him. He put his arms around him and held Dean close to him.

'I'm so scared.' Cas whimpered.

'Don't be scared Cas.' Dean kissed him on the forehead. 'I'm here now. I'm here now.' Dean kissed him on the forehead again, then lifted Cas's chin up and kissed him passionately on the lips. Cas's hands extended wider and Dean felt his chest being pulled up to him.

'Are you hurt?' Dean asked after pulling away. Cas looked into his eyes again.

'My ankle.'

Dean then put one arm around Cas's back, and the other under his knees and lifted him up.

'I'm taking you home.'

Castiel couldn't remember many things after that. His head hurt, and Dean's kiss seemed like a dream. He could recall being laid on the back seat of his car, and being carried into Bobby's house, but he wasn't given the full story of how he travelled back to Bobby's until later that day. He awoke at around 1:00 in the afternoon and after being in a sleepy trance for a few minutes, trying to remember the night before, he realised that there was another body next to him. Cas turned slowly, trying not to wake whoever the person was, then he saw that it was Dean. His eyes were closed and his hair was ruffled, just as Cas had imagined after the night they had spent together in the motel. His eyes were fixated on the human's face. He counted the freckles, he counted the eyelashes, he watched his chest move as he breathed. At around 2, the body moved and two large green eyes were revealed to Cas.

'Hello.' The man said.

'Hello Dean.'

Dean moved his hand to Cas's face and stroked his cheek with his thumb, then he leaned forward and kissed him.

'I'm sorry.'

Cas smiled.

'I'm sorry too.' They shuffled towards each other.

'I need to explain everything to you.' Dean began. 'Everything. Okay?'

Cas nodded.

'My Dad is John Winchester.'

Cas frowned and opened his mouth slightly.

'John Winchester who...'

'Who killed people.'

Cas nodded.

'He... he killed people. He...' Dean began to tear up. 'He did some bad things. He killed our _mother_. He,' Dean swallowed. 'he made me feel ashamed to be his son. And he went to prison, and Bobby took us in. But this year he killed himself... and we had him cremated and we had to have the ashes taken to Lawrence so we, Sam and _I_, could at least-' Dean huffed. 'I'm sorry,'

'No, Dean. It's okay.'

'Anyway uh- it's not good being a Winchester. Sam and I don't like it. We... we don't like it at all. That's why we prefer the names we gave you. Just to make us _feel _safe. Is that okay?'

'Dean-' Cas kissed him on the forehead and put his arms around him. Dean buried his head into Cas's chest and began to sob. 'Shhh. It's okay. I've got you.'

Dean let Cas hold him after he finished crying. Cas didn't mind; he knew that Dean needed someone. If anyone was going to watch over Dean at that moment, it was going to be Cas.

'I guess I should tell you my own story.'

Dean looked up at Cas and smiled, which lifted Cas's spirit again.

'Okay.' Dean then lay his head down on Cas's chest again.

'I work in a post office, driving to houses and giving them their packages. Sam came to me saying he would pay me double the amount if _I _took the brief case to you. He said, "my brother would like it if you went there in a car." So, I did.'

'Thank you.'

'It's okay. I understand that you wanted a person to drive it there so they could watch over it.'

'No,' Dean looked up at Cas, 'I mean, yes, thank you for going the distance Cas. But, thank you for meeting me. If you hadn't have done this, then I would never have met you. And I'm happy that I did.'

Cas smiled.

'I'm happy that I met you too.'

They lay in bed talking for the next three hours, until finally they went downstairs and had a slice of pie to eat. Cas just couldn't hold in his feelings. He was glowing with happiness. Being with Dean brought out the side of him he thought had died, and he couldn't wait to show that side every day. For Dean, that was the epitome of comfort. Sitting on the couch with the man of his dreams, eating his favourite food and talking about the most absurd things. For him, that was heaven. Cas put his plate on the coffee table, moved his legs up onto Dean's lap, and leaned back.

'What are you doing after this?' Dean asked.

'I'm going to stay with you for as long as possible. Then maybe, you could come to Illinois with me.'

'Well, I was going to ask if you wanted a shower with me. But,' Dean grinned. 'I'd love to do that too. I would, Cas.'

Cas smiled and rubbed his feet on Dean's thighs. Then Dean leaned over to Cas's ear to whisper.

'Let's have the shower first though.'


End file.
